caleb would have been one this month.

christmas has never been the same for me again. i'm not back where i was last year, all depressed and confining myself in the house, but i am also not going all out to celebrate christmas anymore. i'm not putting up the tree, i'm not planning to host christmas dinners for our families, nothing.
don't get me wrong, i'm not angry or sad anymore. it's just that i've lost that christmasy feeling.