i am so so thankful for b. we had a discussion 2/3 weeks back and we agreed that i would quit my job at our company & be a full-time housewife cum a stay-at-home mother (soon, i hope!). truth be told, i can no longer see myself in our company running it together with him. we got into a lot of arguments & then there was anger & resentment, & it would sometimes spill into our personal lives which made everything unhappy & unbearable.
it is so much better now. i can actually say that we are so much happier & it seems like this huge pressure has been lifted. we argue a lot less (for where is there a relationship without any fights?). i might even venture to say that we are more loving towards each other now (well, maybe I am because i'm a lot more submissive now!) & we actually take the time to savour each other's company (because we are not constantly seeing each other 24/7 now!)
i must admit, never in a million years would i imagine myself in this typical woman's role. i was always argumentative & head-strong (ie stubborn. head-strong is just a better way of saying it). i must also say, i am really enjoying my time at home: cleaning the home, doing laundry, cooking dinner for him, etc. this is so, so new to me - actually enjoying it.
i also know for a fact that we are both less stressed now. we are not at each other's throats over work anymore. after our first miscarriage, when we were trying, there was a lot going on back then, with work & his granny being really ill. when we did find the time to try, it was either he could not perform or i was entirely put off by the sheer idea of him touching me (me not performing). well, he certainly has no problems now! he's ready anytime, anywhere, at the drop of a pin! I am trying to keep up!
i'm just tying up loose ends for the company now & handing them over. we have not actually put a final date to it, it'll just be whenever everything's done which works out for both of us.
oh! also, he's encouraging me to start something on my own & i do have a couple of ideas of what i want to do. of course all these ideas revolve around pregnancy & motherhood & i must say, he's really excited about a number of them. well, i have already started researching some of them before i make a decision. but of course with the defects list this week & the major cleaning operation i have to do, top with tying up loose ends for the company, i'm just taking it easy with "my business".
again, i'm so glad that i have got b as a husband. he's supportive, encourages me AND most importantly, he believes in me. : )